Golfers – hackers, not pros – have the right idea. Mess up a shot and you can declare a “mulligan,” a do-over. That would be mighty handy when it comes to your family, friends, work and on and on.

Of course, Easter isn’t really “starting over.” It’s more fixing what was messed up and making it as it was meant to be in the first place.

So how can you fix what you’ve messed up? How can you make things as they were meant to be in the first place? A few suggestions:

• Never underestimate the power of “I’m sorry,” both sacramentally (in confession) and socially (between you and others). Neither is easy because we hate to admit to ourselves that we are wrong and we really hate admitting that to others.

• Accept another’s “I’m sorry” graciously. Just as God offers you grace when you celebrate the sacrament of reconciliation, you can gracefully receive another person’s admission of guilt and his or her asking for forgiveness. This can be challenging too because it just feels so darned good to say, “Yes, I forgive you, but ...,” and then get in a few shots, digs, pointed comments. (“I told you so” is an all-time favorite.)

• Create an atmosphere in your home, in your marriage, that makes it easier to ask and to offer forgiveness. How? Want only the best for each other. Be aware that you play a central role in helping those loved ones become better people and they have the same responsibility toward you. Love builds them – and you – up. Grudges and resentment do the opposite.

• Be patient with yourself. God, who is all-knowing, hasn’t given up on you. So you, who are not all-knowing, would be more than a little foolish to throw in the towel with “I’ll never...,” “I just can’t...” or “There’s no way I’m going to...” Curb your tongue. Quit smoking. Focus at work and get the job done. Get along with that one person who tends to drive you right up the wall! (Humility and perseverance can accomplish a lot!)

• Remember Judas and Peter. Each messed up big-time. Judas betrayed Jesus. Peter denied him – three times! One assumed what he did was unforgivable. The other returned to Christ and then went on to lead the early church and to sainthood.

• Realize that even though some things can’t be undone – the harm you caused another or the harm that you endured because of another – you can choose to move forward and do good. To acknowledge the past, accept the past and know that even though in some ways it may hobble you, you’re not shackled to it. With God, all things are possible.

With God, Easter is possible.

From Pope John Paul II

This spring marks the third anniversary of the death of Pope John Paul II. Here’s a little advice he offered on starting over and Easter: “The future starts today, not tomorrow. ... Do not abandon yourselves to despair. We are the Easter people and alleluia is our song.”

On the Web: Easter and Kids

Lisa Hendey’s site, CatholicMom.com/easter, has a long list of Easter-related activities for children, including recipes and cheap (excuse us, frugal) ways to decorate.

Bill and Monica Dodds are the founders of the Friends of St. John the Caregiver and editors of My Daily Visitor magazine. Their website is www.FSJC.org. They can be contacted at MonicaDodds@YourAgingParent.com.